Awakening…

by-Zabani

Awakening is something we do continuously throughout our individual lifetime. When I consider my many awakening moments, they are usually preceded with a huge event that causes the shift.

I think about my “ground zero” when I not just tossed out, but heaved away from me, all that I had learned about religion, and slowly re-built my spirituality into something less rigid, more feminine, and most certainly, less judgmental, freeing rather confining, and easier to live within as I myself expanded into further awareness.

There are days when I constrict, and there are times when I expand. I’m guessing it’s like that with you….

There is nothing wrong, either way. We are organic by nature. That implies there are times of cocooning –of hibernating, and there are times to peek out from beneath the layers of life, and to blossom into our undeniable beauty/

Today, although it is Easter/Eostre/Ostara Sunday as I write this, I am feeling a sense of cocooning, of withdrawing into the pages and feeling my way thru what’s left of the weekend….

My mind is on today. It’s on new beginnings and awakenings. And I am awakening from a 21 year journey that has brought me from the day my then 21-year-old son died, to the present moment where he would soon be gone for an equal length of time.

That means he would be celebrating his 42nd birthday, if he were here to share it.

That means he has now been gone for as long as he lived.

My thoughts are not of sadness, at least not of grief, but are a mother’s tribute of tears that remind me to remind him, that he will never be forgotten….

Spring is here in the Northern Hemisphere. It’s a time for awakening. But today, today I will tuck myself into the cocoon and hibernate for a few more days, until my next awakening…. I’m setting the snooze button for a few more self-nurturing moments in my chrysalis….

Happy Easter my lovely reader.

And much love and gratitude for sharing the journey.

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