My eyes have seen beyond grief’s curtain. No longer am I victimized by an emotional charge that in the past would have consumed me. In fact, in the past, at some level, albeit non-conscious, I had missed the truth that pretty much everyone who has lived has experienced some level of grief. What I know for sure is that I am not alone.
This awareness that we each have our own individual challenge to bear, is not what led me to explore my own grief so fully. That was a purely personal action, again made non-consciously. It was an urge to make sense of the senseless, that ultimately led me to the dark inner journey that took years to complete. But complete, I did. And with that completion came a force which causes the legendary phoenix to pale in comparison.
Our journeys are personal. After all, no one has experienced the heartache and heart-filled experiences of another. We are each blessed in unique ways, by various events.More important than the event that creates the grief is how we process that grief. Click To Tweet
Grief is an emotion that can become permanently stuck in our energy bodies. When the emotional energy is stuck, it stops the energetic flow and stops us from moving forward; The internal barrier blocks enjoyment and success. And when that happens, dis-ease can eventually, often rapidly, manifest as disease such as cancer, heart-disease, hypertension, diabetes, stroke, etc.
It is critical to the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being that all emotion be processed lest it become stagnant, and block the circulation needed for health and wholeness.Â
Part of a healthy process for working through any emotional energetic charge is to first take a step back from the emotion and identify the characteristics. There is another side to be seen. Once that whole picture is clear, the next step is to notice what, if any, emotional attachment there is to holding onto the charge. What does holding onto the event at an energetic level do for you? What is the benefit, the reward for holding on?
The profoundly empowering lesson is ultimately understanding that there is a reward for holding on, otherwise you would not hold on. Unless there is a benefit of holding onto the energy of the original event, you would have released it. It really is that simple.
When identified as a benefit, we can then make a conscious choice to release the emotional energetic block by expressing gratitude and then releasing it. Again, it really is that simple. The reward of holding onto a particularly heinous or personally painful memory may be as simple as owning a label. For example, when my son suddenly died, I became an immediate member of the “Mothers Who Have Lost Children” club.
As it turned out, I didn’t much care for the club meetings. They seemed to continually rip off the scab, never giving it/me time to heal before picking it raw again. It was a label that I could easily have embraced, a thorny crown of modern-day. But being surrounded by other grieving mothers just wasn’t what I needed at the time. My style rather, was to go so far deep into myself, there was a real chance I would not return. My reward was more inclined towards being consumed by grief and never again taking a risk to even leave the house. Ever. But that’s not real either. The world keeps spinning on its axis despite what we are feeling. There’s nowhere to hide from the future.
Of course, the spoiler alert is that I am here writing. I did come out of the mire, armed with many new perspectives. My blessings are many. I have experienced a depth of love so unexplainable, that I won’t even try to convey my experience. My only hope is that you never have to feel that intensity of love: Pure raw love that comes of losing a child. But as for the growth, I want badly to say that I wouldn’t change it for anything. That’s of course not quite true. I would gladly change it for even one more second with my son. For that, I would give it all.
The balance of Nature is present and predictable. The pairing of miracles and grief are balanced. That’s the way with Nature: the good and the bad; the dark and the light. If only we invest the time and courage and energy to trespass where few dare; to enter into the lightless abyss of grief despite our fear of what demons reside there.
Yet the reward for making the journey is steeped in much more than is the small reward for harboring the stuck emotion as some sort of war wound. The gift in the trenching is finally finding the real you.
And now, throughout the decades, in addition to learning to master my own emotional blocks and reveal the true gifts, I’ve also witnessed several thousand women and men release their internalized emotions. The truly astonishing byproduct is that the effects of the release of that stored energy in 100% of the cases are physically visible. Holding on takes a great deal of struggle, and when that struggle is relaxed, so is the expression, the posture, the aura, and the whole mind-body-spirit self. It’s a beautiful thing.
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