Transformation ToolboxWomen's Empowerment

Never EVER EVER Try to LOSE Weight Again!

If you’re a person who has ever struggled with maintaining your optimal goal weight, you are not alone. According to the Center for Disease Control in America, more than one-third of all Americans are not only overweight, but are actually in the obese category.

Every year, especially around this new year beginning, billions of dollars are spent on diets, supplements, exercise equipment, and spa memberships, as well as on nutritional programs, and lest we forget, rising health insurance premiums.

It’s not about vanity. Unhealthy weight is deadly and leads to diabetes, coronary problems, heart disease, myriad other diseases and premature death. And yes, a little self-love goes a long way in the battle of the bulge.


In many of these cases, particularly where morbid obesity is concerned, body armor is the culprit in these deaths. And body armor comes from emotions which are held in the body as protection against intruders, in many cases.

For over a decade, my clients included women who had been victimized either sexually or physically. These women insulated themselves against further assault by adding layer upon layer of protection. The fat was the equalizer. It also served to make these women less attractive, thus less prone to sexual attack, as far as the subconscious mind could take them.

Of course this logic is not true. It is not only culturally aesthetically attractive women who are abused. But the human spirit has a way of making corrections based on the information presented. And if the victim believes that all she can control is the size and weight of her body, she may have a conscious or subconscious response that provides her with some [imagined] sense of control.

In other words, she puts on the weight because it is the one thing she feels she can control in the circumstances. It may be a passive-aggressive response based on an inability or unwillingness to face the real issue, which in some cases may be another person who is bigger, stronger, and more intimidating than she is.

Let’s back this off of the extreme example, and address the average Josephine who is carrying a dozen extra pounds or so, weight that has stacked on over the years of not taking mindful care of the self. And yes, it could still be a passive-aggressive response to a judgmental partner, or as a result of trying to fill an emotional hole that needs tending to. Regardless, the weight is an issue if it’s an issue to you, or if it’s a condition that places you at risk health-wise.

So with all this said, you may be wondering about the punch line that actually addresses the title of this post, “Never try to lose weight again.”

We all recognize the dangers in not living a life committed to wellness. Yet here we are at the first of each year, looking in the mirror and wondering what the…. When did it all start to go south?

We may have excuses: Oh woe is me, I had a nasty case of Shingles that kept me in bed for six weeks, and I couldn’t eat healthy or exercise…. Or maybe it goes more like this: I am so busy with work and kids and [fill in the blank] that I don’t have time to get to the gym…or I haven’t got the money for all that expensive exercise equipment. 

You get the picture.

  • It’s a matter of priorities.
  • It’s a matter of self-love.
  • It’s a matter of choices.

Your mind, my mind, everybody’s minds are programmed with a little inner detector that is designed to help us locate our keys when we misplace them. It is an innate radar that is designed to help us find our way, when we are lost. And it’s an inner trigger that hears the word, lose, and seeks to find whatever is lost.


Trying to “lose weight” is far less productive than is trying/committing to achieve something such as a chosen “goal weight.” I could hypnotize you into thinking it’s okay to lose weight, but I’ve gotta tell you that we would be much more successful if instead, I hypnotized you into a self-love mindset that believed there was a better way to live.

  • When emotional baggage is released, weight is released
  • When inner beliefs of unworthiness are replaced with self-worth, the body firms up
  • When self-loathing is replaced with self-love, the weight melts off
  • When health and wellness are the focus, health and wellness are the reality

This year, please don’t set about the process of trying to lose weight. Instead, take a look at the real issue. And if it’s self-loathing, laziness (which is self-loathing), apathy (which is self-loathing), emotional eating (which is self-loathing), poor diet (which is self-loathing), or any of myriad excuses, take a look in the mirror and commit to doing whatever it takes to fall in love…with that reflection in the mirror.

And if that’s a struggle do something else. Either join a gym, start eating healthy, and focus on wellness, or hire a coach who knows how to support you and keep you accountable and helps you focus on doing whatever it takes to fall in love…with that reflection in the mirror…. I can help.


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